Friday, November 21, 2008
Doctor and Jasbir.. !!
Doctor to Jasbir: Ab aapki tabiyat kaisi hai.
Jasbir : Doctor saheb Pehle se jyada kharab ho gayi hai.
Doctor : Dawai khali thi kya?
Jasbir : Nahi doctor saheb. Dawai ki shishi to bhari hui thi.
Doctor : Are Jasbir ji mere kehne ka matlab hai ki, dawai le li thi kya.
Jasbir : Ji, aapne dawai de di thi aur maine le li thi.
Doctor: Abe, dawai pili thi kya?
Jasbir : Oho, nahi doctor saheb, dawai to lal thi.
Doctor : Abe GADHE, Dawai ko piliya tha kya?
Jasbir : Nahi Doctor, Piliya to mujhe tha.
Doctor( in frustration) : Abe teri to, Dawai ko muh lagakar Pet me dala tha ke nahi?
Jasbir : Nahi doctor saheb.
Doctor : Kyon?
Jasbir : Kyonki dhakkan band tha.
Doctor : Teri to.....sale. ....., to Khola kyon nahi.
Jasbir : Saheb, aapne hi to kaha tha ki, shishi ka dhakkan band rakhna.
Doctor : Tera ilaz main nahi kar sakta.....!! !
Jasbir : Accha Doctor saheb ye to bata do ki main thik kaise hounga
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Love Story
I had three friends. Eric, Cathlyn, Carol.
Eric was chased by all the girls in our high school.
Cathlyn was one of those popular girls.
Cheerleader, sexy, and stylish.
Carol was just one of those plain and average girls .
Cathlyn and Carol were both totally crazy and wacko over Eric.
Cathlyn didn't have to do anything to attract Eric.
For she was already attractive enough.
Carol on the other hand, showered Eric which love and care.
Carol wasn't ugly at all.
In fact, she looked sweet and pleasant.
But she wasn't a cheerleader, she didn't were spaghetti-straps or tubes.
So like everyone expected, Eric chose Cathlyn.
For Carol was just one ordinary and plain girl.
While Cathlyn was labele d as the cool and attractive type.
Eric always insulted Carol.
Telling her what a 'Plain Jane' she was.
And how dumb she looked.
Which obviously made Carol feel so hurt and useless.
That's life. Carol never gave up though.
She wanted to prove something to Eric.
She wanted to prove that looks aren't everything.
She studied hard, really hard.
She became the top girl, and all the guys who once ignored her, chased her.
But she never forgot Eric.
Everyday, she put a red rose in Eric's locker.
Always with the same words.
'I care for you, and I always will'
Because she knew that Eric was facing a hard time.
Eric began to realise.
How dumb he had been.
His beloved girlfriend, Cathlyn.
Was flirting with other guys.
He regretted for choosing the wrong girl.
Cathlyn broke up with Eric later.
For she had found a wealthier guy.
Eric felt so cheated, stupid and dumb.
He went to look for Carol.
He knelt on his knees, and said.
"Carol, please forgive me. Do you want to be my girlfriend?"
Carol rejected him, much to everyone's surprise.
She only uttered these words.
"You've suffered a great loss, so I don't want you to face
another one"
Eric felt disappointed.
He didn't understand a word that she said to him.
But they became good friends.
Did everything together.
Eric began to change into someone better.
Because Carol showered him with the love he never experienced before.
His ex-girlfriends had never treated him that way.
They just accepted him for his looks.
But Carol accepted him for himself .
She changed him.
Carol continued putting a red rose into his locker everyday.
With the same words. She never forgot.
One day, Carol didn't turn up in school.
She didn't come for a week.
At first, Eric thought that she was on a vacation with her family.
Because she told him that she would be going Hawaii with them.
But one day. He received a call from the General Hospital.
Saying that Carol was about to die.
She had been suffering from cancer.
But Carol forbade them from telling him.
Because she didn't want Eric to worry about her.
But now that she was about to die.
She wanted to see Eric for the last time.
Eric rushed to the hospital.
When he saw how weak Carol was.
Tears began rushing down his cheeks.
He whispered.
"Why didn't you tell me earlier? Why did you hide this from me?"
She looked at him . And smiled weakly at him.
"When I said that I didn't want you to suffer from facing another loss, I meant this. I didn't want to tell you because I didn't want you to worry. I wanted to spend my last days with you cheerfully." Eric looked at her.
"You can't leave me!" he said.
"What will I be without you?"
"You'll be who you are now. I will always be there by your side. Never forget that. Cherish those times. Live life happily. And one more thing."
"Yes?" "I love you" And she died. Eric screamed.
He still couldn't accept Carol's death.
He had only spent a month with Carol.
A month. But Carol changed his life in a way.
A way that no one could ever explain. He regretted.
But he knew that Carol would always be keeping an eye on him from Heaven.
Sometimes We just don't appreciate those people who really care for us.
Until they leave us. Until we lose them. Then we regret.
Outer beauty doesn't matter; it's the inner one that counts.
It's better to tell someone how much you love them.
Rather than to not tell them and lose them without telling them.
You'll regret Love is. When we fight till the very last minute.
Just to show and tell someone how much we love them.
we'll miss u dada (ganguly)
As the curtains come down on Sourav's illustrious 13-year international career, we all salutes
India's most successful captain for all his on and off field achievements. You will forever remain a hero and an
inspiration for us, Dada. May you continue to prosper and achieve even greater heights in your life ahead. All the best!
His milestones
31 Man of the match in ODI
6 Man of the match in Tests
7 Man of the series in ODI
3 Man of the series in Tests
Sportstar Person of the Year 1998
Arjuna Award
1998
For outstanding performance in cricket
CEAT Cricketer of the Year
99-00
Cash prize of 5 lakh rupees and a trophy
CEAT Indian Captain of the Year
01-02
For outstanding achievement as leader
Award for Cricketing Excellence
2003
Presented to men who made "the difference"
Padma Shri
2004
4th highest civilian award in India
Rammohan Roy Award
2004
For outstanding performance as captain
Young Achiever's Award
2008
Presented to "role models" for young people
Castrol Batsman of the Year
2008
For being Asia's best batsman in 2007
Castrol Asian Cricketer of the Year
2008
For being the best cricketer overall in Asia in 2007
Cricket Achievements
July 1996: Became one of the few cricketers who have scored a century on debut. He made his Test debut against England at Lords in 1996, and went on to score a century in the very next match as well. He joined another select brand of 3 batsman who made tons in their 1st two Test innings.
July 1996: Sourav was only the 3rd batsman in the world to score a century on debut at Lords. His 131 still remains the highest by any batsman on his debut at Lord’s. 0 runs in a calendar year (1328 runs) in ODI.
Jan 1999: Completed 3000 ODI runs in 87 ODIs in a game against New Zealand.
Feb 1999: Completed 2000 Test runs in 27 Tests in a game against Sri Lanka.
Mar 1999: Sourav became one of the few distinct players in the World to score a century and take 4 wickets in an ODI match.
May 1999: Sourav’s highest one day score, a mammoth 183 against Sri Lanka in the 1999 World Cup was, at the time, the highest by an Indian in an ODI, breaking Kapil Dev’s record of 173.
May 1999: His 183 against Sri Lanka remains the highest by an Indian in a World Cup.
May 26 1999: Was involved in the 2nd highest partnership in ODIs: a 318-run partnership with Dravod vs. SL in the 99 World Cup. Rahul & Sourav became the 1st pair to put up a 300 run partnership in ODIs..
Aug 1999: Completed 4000 ODI runs in 110 ODIs in a game against Sri Lanka.
1999: Sourav bagged as many as 8 Man of the Match awards in the year!
1999: Scored 1000 runs in a calendar year (1767 runs) in ODI and made the highest number of runs by any player in ODI for 1999.
Jan 2000: Completed 5000 ODI runs in 131 ODIs in a game against Pakistan.
Feb 2000: Became the captain of the Indian team when Sachin Tendulkar stepped down in Feb of 2000.
Oct 2000: Fastest in the world to complete 6000 ODI runs in 152 ODIs in a game against Zimbabwe.
2000: Scored 1000 runs in a calendar year (1579 runs) in ODI and made the highest number of runs by any player in ODI for 2000.
2001: Sourav and Sachin became one of the most successful opening pairs ever in one-day cricket!
Mar 2001: In the 2nd Test vs. Australia at Kolkata in the Border-Gavaskar Trophy, Sourav became only the 3rd captain in Cricket history to lead a team to victory after following on. India went on to win the series 2-1!
Oct 2001: Fastest in the world to complete 7000 ODI runs in 180 ODIs in a game against Kenya.
Nov 2001: Completed 3000 Test runs in 47 Tests in a game against South Africa.
2001: Sourav and Tendulkar were involved in a World Record Opening Partnership of 252.
Sep 2002: Completed 4000 Test runs in 62 Tests in a game against England.
Nov 2002: Fastest in the world to complete 8000 ODI runs in 208 ODIs in a game against WI.
2002: Scored 1000 runs in a calendar year (1114 runs) in ODI.
March 2003: Became the 1st Indian Captain in 2 decades to take his team to the World Cup Final!
2003 World Cup: Became the 2nd highest century maker in ODIs, after Sachin Tendulkar.
Jan 2004: Led his team to a 1-1 series draw against Australia and retained the Border-Gavaskar trophy (2003-2004).
Jan 2004: Fastest in the world to complete 9000 ODI runs in 236 ODIs in a game against Australia.
2004: Became the fastest player to score 9,000 runs in ODIs (in just 236 matches and 228 innings), breaking fellow teammate Sachin Tendulkar's record of 242 ODIs.
Mar - Apr 2004: Became the first Indian captain to win an ODI and Test series in Pakistan.
April 2004: Became India’s most successful Test captain, with 18 test wins in just five years, of which 9 have come on foreign soil. No other Indian Captain has achieved such a feat.
May 2004: Joined the top 20 list of players who hit the most sixes in Test cricket, with 41 sixes.
Feb 2005: Climbed to the #3 spot in the list of most sixes hit by a batsman in ODI with 168 sixes in 247 matches.
April 2005: Became only the 3rd cricketer and 2nd Indian after Mohammed Azharuddin to make 5000 ODI runs as skipper in the Pepsi Cup vs. Pakistan.
August 2005: Sourav's fifty in the 3rd ODI against Sri Lanka in the tri-nation series in Sri Lanka helped him pass 10,000 runs in ODIs. He was only the 3rd cricket4r and 2nd Indian to achieve this rare feat.
Since Comeback
December 2006: After being out of the side because of politics for 10 months, Dada is RECALLED to the Indian Team for the South Africa Test series after India recd a drubbing at the hands of the hosts in the ODI series, losing 0-4. This is the 1st test team selection after Kiran More stepping down and Vengsarkar taking over as Chief Selector.
Jan 2007: Dada emerges the highest run-getter for India in the South Africa Test series with 2 50s and 214 runs in all. Silences decorators within and outside the team with his remarkable return to Test cricket.
Jan 2007: After a terrific comeback into the Test side, Dada is recalled into the ODI team after a gap of 1 and a half years. The Maharaj makes a brilliant comeback in one-dayers also with an explosive 98 off 110 balls. Dada is back on top and is hailed by fans and critics alike.
Feb 12, 07: After scoring 168 runs in the home series vs WI at an average of 56.08, Dada is picked in the final 15 men squad for the World Cup in the Caribbean. His dream finally comes true!
Feb 2007: Dada is awarded the MAN OF THE SERIES award in the home series vs. SL for making the most runs in the series - 168 runs in 3 games at an average of 84.00! In the six matches since his recall, Dada scores four 50s. Across the country, he is hailed as the "KING OF COMEBACKS" for making one of the strongest comebacks ever in the history of cricket.. This award comes in only his 2nd series after the recall and after a gap of 6 yrs.
June 2007: With their 134 run open partnership against South Africa in the 2nd ODI of the Future Cup in Belfast, Sourav and Sachin Tendulkar registered their 17th 100-run open stand to become the most successful opening pair in ODI cricket history. Sourav and Sachin reclaimed their record after Adam Gilchrist and Mathew Hayden had edged past in Feb 2007.
August 2007: Sourav reaches 11,000 ODI runs in the 3rd ODI against England in the Natwest Series. He is only the second Indian after Tendulkar and fourth player in the world to achieve the feat. He is also the second fastest after Tendulkar to reach 11k.
September 2007: Sourav is only the 4th Indian player and 8th overall to reach 300 one-day internationals in the 5th ODI vs. England in the Natwest Series at Leeds. Dada celebrated his 300th ODI in style with a man-of-the match performance that bought India back into the 7-ODI series after being 3-1 down.
September 2007: Sachin and Sourav put their 19th century open-partnership together in the 5th ODI vs. England in the Natwest Series at Leeds, crossing 6,000 runs as an opening pair - the highest ever in ODI cricket.
September 2007: Dada reaches 1000 runs in a calendar year in ODI. Since his comeback in January 2007, Dada has played 20 games in which he scored 1000 runs at an average of over 55.
November 2007: Dada reaches 100 ODI wickets with the wicket of Shahid Afridi in the 4th ODI vs. Pakistan at Gwalior. Sourav is only the 3rd player ever to score 10,000 runs and take 100 wickets in ODI after Sachin Tendulkar and Sanath Jayasuriya.
December 2007: Dada completes 6000 Test runs in 2nd Test against Pakistan at Kolkata. Also hits 1st Test hundred in front of home crowd at Eden Gardens.
December 2007: Dada hits 15th Test hundred to bring up back-to-back tons in the 3rd Test against Pakistan in Bangalore. Sourav has achieved this feat three times in his career - on debut, against Sri Lanka in 1997/98 and against Pakistan in 2007.
December 2007: Dada reaches 1000 runs in a calendar year in Tests for the 1st time in his career in the 2nd innings of the 3rd Test.
December 2007: Dada is awarded the MAN OF THE SERIES in the India-Pakistan Test series at home. Sourav a whopping 534 runs in 3 Tests at an average of 89.00. Sourav scored 8, 48, 102, 46, 239, and 91 in 6 innings. He also took 4 wickets to take India to a 1-0 series win over Pakistan. Dada was the highest scorer in the series.
December 2007: Dada is only the 7th Indian to reach 100 Test matches.
March 2008: Dada receives Young Achiever's award for being an inspiration to youngsters.
April 2008: Sourav is awarded man of the match for his match winning 87 in the 1st innings of the low scoring 3rd Test at Kanpur against South Africa, April 13 2008.
June 2008: Sourav swept top honors at the 1st Castrol Asian Cricket Awards in Karachi. He was adjuged "Castrol Asian Cricketer of the Year" and "Castrol Best Asian Batsman of the Year" for being the highest run-getter in Asia in 2007.
October 2008: Dada reached 7,000 Test runs in Mohali in the 2nd Test of the Border-Gavaskar series. He is only the 4th Indian cricketer after Dravid, Tendulkar, and Gavaskar to reach the milestone.
November 2008: Sourav walked into the sunset in the 2008 Border-Gavaskar. Like Sir Don Bradman, he was out for a golden duck in his last innings, but Dada did score his 17th Test Test in his final series.
I've some doubts.. Just kiding.
I've some doubts.. Can u please clarify me..
1. When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it? (to be given a thought)
2. If the "black box" flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole airplane made out of that stuff? (very good thinking)
3. Who copyrighted the copyright symbol? (who knows)
4. Can you cry under water? (let me try)
5. Why do people say, "you've been working like adog" when dogs just sitaround all day? (I think they meant something else)
6. Why are the numbers on a calculator and a phone reversed? (God knows)
7. Do fish ever get thirsty? (let me ask and tell)
8. Can you get cornered in a round room? (by oneseyes)
9. Why do birds not fall out of trees when they sleep? (tonight I will stayand watch)
10. If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oilis made from vegetables,then what is baby oil made from? (No comments)
11. What should one call a male ladybird? (Nocomments)
12. If a person suffered from amnesia and then was cured would they rememberthat they forgot? (can somebody help )
13. Can you blow a balloon up under water? (yes u can)
14. Why is it called a "building" when it is already built? (strange isn't it)
15. If you were traveling at the speed of sound and you turned on your radio would you be ! Able to hear it? (got to think scientifically)
16. If you're traveling at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, what happens?
17. Why is it called a TV set when theres only one? (very nice)
18. Why do most cars have speedometers that go up to at least 130 when you legally can't go that fast on any road?
19. If drink & drive is not allowed why the hell they have parking in Bars?
Smile
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